


In Which Sam Eliot Wants 1 (One) Thing

by iridescent_blue



Category: The Society (TV 2019)
Genre: M/M, Oneshot, SO COOL, Sign Language, but its all good were all happy, everything is fine, grizz is also in love, i agonized over the grammar of making grizz's name possessive, i binged the society uhhhhhh two days ago and im in loVE, i do summaries in the tags im sORRY, it took like an hour, my single gay ass is living vicariously through grizz n sam, no beta we face god like real idiots, only big happy, please appreciate it, sam is so in love, sams just mad in love n wants to hear grizz's voice, seriously i ate dinner inbetween writing this, there is no big sad, turns out you can put an apostrophe after a z
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-27
Updated: 2019-06-27
Packaged: 2020-05-20 13:23:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19377589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iridescent_blue/pseuds/iridescent_blue
Summary: Sam really wants to hear Grizz's voice. He really does. But he can't.But his boyfriend happens to possess more brain cells than him and figures out a solution.And so Sam is happy and all is well.





	In Which Sam Eliot Wants 1 (One) Thing

**Author's Note:**

> i binged the society starting at 2pm on a sunday and running until 9 am the following monday (with lots of breaks) and i didn't sleep at all. fuck my friends but at the same time, i'd die for grizz and sam. my dumbass gay self c r a v e s what they have so i'm just living vicariously at this point. 
> 
> anyway hope you like it! it took me roughly an hour to write and some amount of searching for deaf experiences, plus a couple of signs. so yeah. no beta. tho i have a grammar checker so things should be okay (?) (theres almost definitely a mistake or four in here. tell me. i will fix it)

When Sam had told Grizz that he wished that he could hear his voice, he meant it. He imagined his voice to be soft and sweet and strong. If he could hear, it would probably be the only thing he’d ever want to listen to in his entire life. But alas, he can’t hear. He’s never going to hear Grizz’s voice out loud, and that thought hurts. He’s never going to hear him hum along to a song, never going to hear him say “I love you,” never going to hear him laugh. 

 

But he can feel it. 

 

They’re lying in bed together, Grizz acting as Sam’s body pillow so he can read Grizz’s lips, and they’re talking. Talking about nothing, mostly about how the farm is growing and how Eden is doing. She’s getting big, almost two months old, and Sam loves her to death (though he doesn’t love her more than Grizz). The farm is doing pretty well, and they’ve just planted some things the earliest that they can. The motivation of “oh shit we will actually starve if we do nothing” was enough to kick the rest of the town into gear to help out. They’ve cut down trees and built a road out to the farm, and it looks pretty fucking stellar to Sam. 

 

It’s still a lot of talking about nothing. The weather, touch football games, and there’s a lot of fond silence, just the two of them staring into each other’s eyes. They’re in one of their spells of comfortable silence, even though silence is all Sam has known since he was four, but they’re not talking, and then Grizz starts.

 

“I’ve always wondered,” he says, clumsily signing along as best he can while still letting Sam lie on top of him, “what it’s like to be deaf. I think if I couldn’t hear, I’d be so alone. Total silence is my biggest fear, just being alone with the things in my head.”

 

“It is lonely. But also not lonely.” Sam reaches up to pet Grizz’s hair. He looks like he’s about to cry. “Even though I can’t hear, I can still feel things. I can feel loud music and the vibrations of trains and cars and people stomping their feet. I can feel my voice vibrating in my throat. So I can feel some sounds, but I can’t hear anything quiet. It’s just sad sometimes.” Grizz wraps his arms around Sam, pulling him into a bear hug (which was apparently how he got the nickname Grizz. It was a long story that involved a lot of Sam laughing very, very hard). “I just get sad that I can’t hear you laugh or sing. I think it would be beautiful.”

 

Grizz smiles, and  _ fuck Sam loves his dimples. _ “My singing isn’t that good.”

 

“I bet anything that would come out of your mouth would sound beautiful.”

 

Grizz doesn’t say anything, he only signs. Palm flat, middle and ring finger pulled down, thumb extended.  _ I love you. _ Sam signs it back. They lie like that, holding those signs against each other, until Grizz shifts and taps Sam.

 

“You said you could feel sound, right?” Sam nods. “Could you feel my voice?” Grizz looks almost as nervous as when he asked Sam to teach him how to say ‘kiss me’ (Sam did teach him. He helped Grizz flatten his hand out, touch the corner of his mouth, and then touch his cheekbone, then point to himself. It was very cute to watch him learn).

 

Sam nods and reaches up to put his hand on Grizz’s neck. He feels Grizz’s breath hitch and realizes it looks like he’s choking Grizz, and that Grizz presumably likes it (he’s got handcuffs, so Sam thinks he’s allowed to assume a few things). Then Grizz starts to talk.

 

For the first few words, Sam doesn’t even bother to read his lips. He’s so obsessed with the feeling of Grizz talking. It’s beautiful. He can feel the little dips his Adam’s apple as he speaks, and the soft vibrations of his voice. 

 

He looks up after a moment and sees that Grizz is signing his words too. He seems to be on a rant of how pretty Sam is. Apparently, to Grizz, Sam’s eyes “are the color of the sky” and his smile “rivals the brightness of the sun.” Grizz talks for a solid minute, Sam thinks, about how wonderful his hair is, and takes another thirty seconds to wax poetic about Sam’s dimples and how nice it is to kiss him. Then Grizz looks Sam dead in the eyes. He stops signing.

 

“And your voice. Fuck, how do I fucking talk about your voice? I don’t even know. You pronounce things differently, but I love it. And I don’t get how people could dislike you because of it. You’re so sincere with everything you say and when you sign, to me I hear your voice saying everything to me. And I just love you, okay? I really, really fucking love you.”

 

Sam sighs. It’s so nice to feel those words. They feel softer to him, like Grizz is afraid to say it. It comes out easier than the first time. That first time, Grizz was stuttering and falling over himself and eventually could only sign it. It was  _ adorable. _

 

But Sam has one more objective for tonight. He can feel Grizz singing some other time, when they’re alone, but for now, he needs to feel him laugh. So he does what anyone would do to get someone to laugh. He pokes Grizz in the stomach, right where he’s ticklish. He jumps and pokes Sam right back, but that’s all Sam needs. He’s giggling and Sam lifts himself up to put his head on Grizz’s chest, feeling all the little vibrations of his laughter. There’s no place he’d rather be at this moment. Grizz laughing is one of the most beautiful things Sam has ever seen. He gets a little flushed in the face and his eyes sparkle and his dimples deepen and he looks cuter than he normally does, which is something that Sam thinks is nearly impossible. 

 

Sam props himself up on an elbow and signs  _ I love you so much, _ then leans down to kiss Grizz. Kissing him never gets old. He’s always so tender and sweet, moving slowly to hold Sam and he feels truly cherished whenever he kisses Grizz. When they first kissed, Sam didn’t feel fireworks. He felt a pull in his gut like he and Grizz were opposite magnets being yanked towards each other. He didn’t see stars, he saw speckles of light behind his eyes, like the light that shines through a forest in the late afternoon. Kissing Grizz is like breathing. 

 

Their kisses are long and slow, and Grizz holds on to Sam delicately, like he’ll lose him at any moment. Ever since their first kiss, Sam has seen Grizz carrying around chapstick in one of his pockets at all times. His lips are always soft and taste just a little bit like vanilla. 

 

They break apart, and Grizz simply says, “I love you until the end of time.” 

 

Sam gives him one last kiss, then reaches over to turn off the light, signing that he’s tired. He is. Work in New Ham is in no way easy, and so everyone in the town has been sleeping heavier, especially with the addition of farm jobs. Falling asleep isn’t a problem for Sam anymore. He used to stay awake, worrying if Campbell was going to come in and threaten or hurt him, but now he has someone to protect him.

 

With the lights out, Sam curls up, hugging Grizz. He closes his eyes, nuzzling into Grizz’s side, and feels Grizz’s chest vibrating where his hand is resting, right on his collarbone. He opens his eyes and looks up, and Grizz is humming something. Sam taps him and signs  _ what song? _

 

Grizz responds by fingerspelling it, pressing the letters into Sam’s shoulder in the darkness.  _ Just a lullaby. _

 

Sam thought that he’d be a “perfect Christian virgin” forever. He thought that no one in this town would want the deaf, gay guy with no friends. But someone did. And that someone was Grizz. And Sam was going to hold on tight to him and never let go. 

**Author's Note:**

> my best friend n i are learning sign bc of sam so uhhhh yeah im on summer break and gonna learn fuckin sign language cause i LOVE MYSELF
> 
> leave some kudos if you liked it! or leave a comment if you want to yell at me. maybe for making grizz talk too much but i love my poet boy ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
> 
> but yeah i hope you liked it i wanna make a lot more of these two dumbasses cause i've got time and theres only so many youtube videos that i wanna watch


End file.
